Thoughts in the waiting zone

Exactly 2 months ago today we met our daughter for the first time. 2 whole months since we have seen her. I wonder if she is walking now? Has her hair grown? Does she remember our faces? It is such a strange thing to not know these details about your child, yet we knew this was the way it would have to be. We watched our video tonight again with the boys. Not the condensed version set to music, but the whole video we have of our time with her. I love hearing her giggle and seeing her respond to us. I love how the boys talk about her all the time and want to watch her video with us. We are really praying we are half-way through our waiting time, the trend seems to be more like 5 months in-between trips but we are praying and claiming that it will be less!

A song that has comforted me so much during this time is the song we have playing right now on our blog (be sure and turn on your volume). It reminds me how big our God is. He is above all things, over all things and created all things, so I can rest in the assurance He is with our Anna and comforting her as only He can do. "I AM" by Mark Schultz

I Couldn't Resist...

Oh how sweet is this dress?!! It probably won't fit for another year, but I was passing through a store today and could not pass it up. I can just picture our sweet Anna in it some day :-)

Remembering

We have been home from our trip to meet Anna for one month. It seems so long ago, and I find myself replaying all the details in my mind of her and the day we met. The emotions and the memories are just as vivid as the day we had Bradey and Brooks. I will never forget how I felt driving out to her orphanage; scared, excited, nervous. Luckily Ryan was my rock and was holding it together for the both of us. I remember our translator talking to us during the drive, but not really hearing what she was saying, all I could think of was "is this really happening, is she really here in this town!" I remember getting choked up as we pulled up to the orphanage, so sad to know there are babies living here who need mommies and daddies. I remember the smell of food in the orphanage, the steps that led the way to the directors office. I will always remember my first glimpse of her, being walked up the stairs by her caregiver, her beautiful dark hair perfectly combed, pink tights, pink shirt, pink vest. When I finally had her in my arms, I couldn't stop saying "I love you" and kissing her. Had she ever been told that before? I wanted her to hear it over and over. I remember her giggle and how she loved to play with balls and sit in my lap. After a while she drifted off to sleep in my arms...what a moment. This has always been my favorite memories with our babies and I got to experience it on my first day with her. We prayed over her, cried over her and then had to give her back to the caregiver. The next day was just as memorable. She seemed more relaxed, crawled all over and even took a few steps for us. Ryan discovered she loves being tickled just like the boys, I remember her laughter and how she wanted him to keep doing it.

All of these memories I will hold onto and replay over and over. If you want to hear them firsthand you can call me, I love to tell them!

American Soil

We just arrived back home this afternoon...and it is very good to be home!

We had an amazing, exhausting, exhilarating, emotional and heart-wrenching trip.  36 hours in the air in 6 days but all worth it for the 4 hours we were able to spend with our daughter.  Since our last post we went to the Notary in Russia to officially accept the referral and spent another couple hours at the orphanage.  We also had some time to explore Krasnoyarsk but could only handle the cold for about 15 minutes before we found an excuse to find some coffee.  In front of our hotel they are preparing for Christmas and New Year celebrations with a huge tree and ice sculptures.  The temperature hovered around -15 F most of the time we were there.  This doesn't seem to bother the Siberians, but Peta would never be able to find enough paint to scratch the surface with all the fur coats.

Our second visit with Anna went very well and it took less time for her to warm up.  She was laughing and playing and we were able to try some clothes on her as well.  She loved to play with the toys we brought and was full of giggles when Ryan played "Airplane" (tame version) with her.  We were comforted to see that she is really well cared for although any one-on-one time is scarce for her.  Saying goodbye was excruciating.  Having been able to spend time with her, see her environment, love on her and then have to leave her behind was as hard as we thought it might be.  We rest in the fact that she is God's child and He will take care of her during this next phase.

Several people have commented that we have not shown pictures of her face...this is because the Russian government and our agency (as well as us) are keen on protecting her identity until we bring her home.  We wish we could share the 175 pictures we took of her but that will have to wait.

After the long ride back to our hotel, we packed up and were up at 4 AM Thursday headed to the airport. We managed to miss our connection in Moscow so had a long layover but were in Amsterdam by that evening. It wouldn't be a full travel experience if our luggage wasn't lost so we were able to put a check in the box on that one for a night in Amsterdam. We were able to extend our stay in Holland and go check out our old stomping grounds. It was a really nice debrief and date day. We had coffee with our former Pastor and his wife, took pictures of the hospital where Brooks was born (filled a missing scrapbook page for Amy), ate Oliebollen in Wassenaar, caught up with our Dutch neighbor and had dinner with the Linkerhof's in Den Haag.



When we got home, we went straight to get Bradey out of school early. The boys did really well with Amy's Mom and we are extremely grateful to her for keeping the show running. We are so thankful for everybody's prayers while we were gone...we could feel it.

Yesterday was the day we met the little girl who we have cried for, yearned for and prayed for.  Our little "Anna".

We landed in Siberia in -27 degrees Celsius at 5:30 AM.  We were taken to our hotel for breakfast and a much needed nap.  We had a chance to shower and prepare for our meeting with the Ministry of Education.  This office overseas all the children who have no parents in this region.  After a meeting with her we were driven approximately 45 minutes to the orphanage.  We met the orphanage director and were able to ask her questions.  She was a nice lady with a genuine concern for the children and the homes they will be placed in.  She was a very warm, inviting lady who also loves the children she is in charge of, and desires loving homes for each of them.  The orphanage was very well taken care of, clean with lots of toys and pictures.  After our meeting we were walking to the room to meet our little one, and as we passed the stair well we saw her being walked upstairs by her caregiver.  Immediately our tears started flowing. 

She was hesitant at first, there were lots of people around fussing over her.  After about 30 minutes of being timid she started to warm up and crawl around.  She stuck close to Amy's lap, we called it her "home base".  She would crawl to get a toy then back herself right back into my lap.  She and Ryan started a game of pass the toy and she loved that.  We played for about an hour and a half, then she drifted off to sleep in my arms while staring at Ryan and him whispering to her.  At her mealtime her caretaker came to get her so we had to say goodbye until the next day.

It is 5:30 AM now, we are starving and in much need of coffee!!  Not a Starbucks to be found in this Siberian tundra.  We will go to the orphanage again at 2 PM.  Please continue to pray, especially for strength today as we will have to say goodbye to her for the next few months.

We are struck by how big our God is...no doubt He knew long ago about this very little girl and placed it on our hearts 6000 miles away.  We have no fear or doubts about this reality and have a sense of peace that only he can give!

Finally!

Almost there

Just a quick note to let everybody know that we have made it to Moscow. Our flights were pretty uneventful and now we have a few hours in a hotel before catching our next flight to Krasnoyarsk. We will catch a bite to eat (they have TexMex in the hotel!) and a few winks before continuing Eastward.

Thank you to everyone for your prayers!

Hopefully we will post tomorrow after we have met our little girl!